and no more priority appointments, lol

per the federal accountability act and the conflict of interest guidelines to which they are subject, these adorable anthropomorphic refreshments will not perform advocacy roles for clients with the federal government.

so don't even bother to be asking why we cant seem to manage more than one post a month these days, because IF YOU MESS WITH US WE WILL MESS WITH YOU UNTIL WE'RE DONE. anyway, to all the exempt staffers lining up at the exits to get your lobbying jobs, please note the wisdom of anonymous lobbying dude in the hill times:

The rationale for doing that is you get out before you become damaged goods, first of all.

which makes a lot of sense, if by "before" you mean "now" and by "damaged goods" you mean STRAIGHT UP BANNED FROM LOBBYING FOR LIKE 5 YEARS, BITCHES! wait, that still doesn't make sense. anyway: hope, shining through the craptacular quebec numbers like a shiny beacon. yes, we speak of that holy, rarely-sighted grail some call the lobbying act exemption. and just in case you're not as well connected and forgetful as fred doucet, let us break down how this works for you. let's say your ass is so banned from lobbying they totally named a ban after you, and even though you did everything right and got yourself a job doing non-lobbying for a lobby group and filed all your paperwork with the commish, your coveted exemption is still not forthcoming. what to do. well, first you find the motherfucker responsible for getting you banned in the first place, who is probably now out there working for one of the biggest lobbying firms on the planet (in a strictly non-lobbying capacity, bien sûr), and then when you've got dude cornered at some cocktail party you ply him with beverages until he starts to get a little maudlin, and that's when you guilt him into lobbying the lobbying commish for your exemption. and we think you can all see how this is a totally well-thought-out plan from which nothing but good can come for all concerned. but either way, don't forget that cash is perfectly legal tender for all your legitimate businessy transactions.